I need a word with you Karma, about my Family Dynamics
Okay, in order to blog on this, I must have evolved into some kind of belief, right Karma? I do not expect my bloggers to agree with all of my knowledge, so here is my say.
Have to look back Karma, and ask how important this is to me, the Family, and what does this has to do with you? Why am I sensing that my family plays an important part from the beginning of me? What is the family demonstrating for my acknowledgement? I know there are so many instances of Love and Hate throughout my family life times and the thought of Karmatic revenues has never entered my mind. So as the story goes…. In the Beginning there is Karma and Family.
Well Karma since I am really my soul looking and living as me, why does Good make family so important to me? I mean, if family is so integrated within every aspect of me, typically I am not an independent being, right? Meaning, I have all these family ties within and without. Is your dream for me the same dream for my family? Let me know Karma, is this an energy entrapment? LOL, I call it an entrapment because as a baby I did not have a whole bunch of choices going on for me in order to create more of you Karma. After all, you are the reap what you sow energy. So I must have already created my returns in order to place myself in the vibration to create more good and better, right Karma? Or for that matter, I was being too young to create bad or worse for me, right Karma? My mind is feeling that your force must be bigger than I can imagine by now!
Karma, might you be hinting that every mindful thought of mine will always place me within the choosing of creation? Of us (me and you) creating my Karma?
Gotta say, the bigger the family, the Bigger (more choices, confusion, comfort zones, likes and hates etc., etc., etc.,) to choose from my dear, as I see it. So many more ego-based perceptions, all coming out of the 2 egos that were allowed the capability of bringing me into this world. (Oh Lordy, thinking about it, I really was not in the greatest of thinking when I brought my children into this world! Are you Grace-built-in too?) Then, add the steps of more stepping-stones for growth and oh brother Karma! Does this mean I will work myself into me, either way of Good or Confusion, bringing it all back to me? Or depending on where my mind will take me? And Karma, it seems that this DNA thingy that I am born into, also has this big hold on me. This is a lot that is asked of my soul Karma, coming into this world of opposites with all these choices, and then dealing with ego’s, plus all my physical DNA dealings too? So Karma, is all this family intermingling within me really what I asked for in order to just Live? I mean really Live this life of emotions, feelings, minds and this inherited body with all the trimmings that come with my choice? I am now at a place of, OMG, it all counts! Did I want to be born in order for me to be able grow with all these people around me in order to Live my life with all my physical attributes and these examples surrounding me? Are you telling me that since I do have energy gifts to work with; look at how I want to live and just LIVE through my life’s choices? What is the meaning of ‘it is in the giving that I am receiving’? Do you mean Karma, that whatever thought, emotion, word, action and energy I give out unto my world of family, you will be there to feel, listen and return that movement? Maybe through them and maybe through anyone? Lots of chances huh? Does that mean my intensions and vibes better be for your good side if that is what I expect as the return from sender? So, I guess if my intensions and vibes are hurtful, vengeful, bitter, insensitive, and stubborn, I should expect this return from sender also? Oh, I think I am getting clearer with you, the messenger, that you have no limit on possibilities for returns.
So Karma if I had choices before I entered into this world, why did I not choose the Best? With all these guides, angels, teachers, energies, good, and you around, I must have had so many choice of families to be born into! I feel I was born into a big learning soup of people! Now Karma did you or Good give me options, or did that flying bird just sweep me up and attach me? Oh now you’re asking me, who is this Best family I am talking about? Well, now that I think about this best?! I think I would have to keep the family I hate in order to keep the family I love around me? Could it be you are telling me there are no accidents? Vibrations are Vibrations huh? Like attract Like huh? It’s all in the Soup?
I guess it might be that I came in with you Karma? What an interesting concept. Oh yes, that we are melded! So, you are a part of my family Karma; a silent participant of me, but a part never the less or never the more? I am thinking this means I have a whole world of me you are holding right? With Lots of vibrations of me right? Maybe that means lots of intermingling to unmingling? It might give me lots of stuff to create with!
Oh Karma, are you showing me that as I was born, my families taught me group energies? They taught me to; talk, shut-up, walk, sit, play, eat, drink, dance, laugh, pray, cry, separate, belong, hurt, give, fight, share, release, love, hate, die, hide, learn, listen, think, lack, make decisions, imagine, wonder? Taught me; mannerism’s, thankfulness, idleness, kindness, stress, excitements, meanness, freedom, manners, jealousies, guilt, discipline, laziness, truthfulness, lying, respect, shame, richness, joyfulness’, forgiveness, violence, relief, awareness, emotions, excitement, wealth, lack, confidence, habits, rituals, pain, fear, comfort, strength, anger, laughter, depression, patience, rudeness, calmness, bossiness, madness, intelligence, calmness, sadness, happiness and all and every experience I can experience during the beginning of my Living A Life? And the wisdoms I selected to intergrade into my being was for MY use for the attractions in this world of energy with all I contribute? And are you whispering that I am here because I did want to Live? Live through all of it, all of my experiences until death do I part from this Life? Are you asking me Karma, that if I can realize with all the strengths and weakness of families, I can chose to bless us all for whatever learnings came to me, if accepted of course? Are you breathing within my breaths that my experiences should have me reaching for my evolvement through every opportunity I am given through you? That all my early experiences were for me to use for maybe just one small act of wisdom or kindness, thus shape-shifting the energies into all things better? Kind of harsh stuff you allowed sometimes Karma? But Karma, if all the above is part of living, I think you might be showing me that I am not in my state of mind called heaven, I am in my state of mind called Living, correct? So to Live this Life now! Are you always demonstrating to me how I am able to create Goodness or Badness beginning within my family birth? And how your very Force Karma, is there through and with me and everywhere and nowhere; bringing with you loving awareness according to my understandings, trial, tribulations and triumphs alike? Interesting…..
Now, don’t get me wrong, I guess we all think we were in competition on getting here on earth; born as we say. But Karma, could you say families may be all in the same connection plan of energy manifestation? Maybe my families are that like-attracts-likeness thing, this Law of Attraction you and me are and bring about? Oh Brothers! Oh Sisters! Oh Mothers! Oh Fathers! Is that why I matched from the beginning and I can understand and relate or even tolerate each other’s actions until I was strong enough to release one choice for another or begin to question my old self in order to move into a newness? Oh Karma, are you now telling me that you function within family and me always? Might you say that I manifested my body into this life-land of energy in order for me to experience a life within my soul until I am the Clearness? That no one, including me, can escape you Karma? No-way, in any-way because you are the energy ingrained in everything we see and do not see, everything we know and do not know, in all unlimited possibilities’ even when we are too young to see? I say getting to know you Karma is bringing us closer.
Listen on Karma…….
Again Karma, what if my family is wild with untamed emotions, actions and reactions? What if my family is full of it? What if my family is making up their own realities based on what they were able to comprehend and expressing those realities as my heaven and hell Karma? Karma, what if my family is always based on survival mode. What if my feelings with my family have left me with a kind of reserved love, or a deep love or an unspoken family guilt or an every-so-often strength for me to do better or a hope for everyone, or a hate for some, or happiness for some? What if this has left me with feelings of both; a sorrow for them for things not learned and a happiness for things I see as learned? Karma, where was your part of Saving Grace as I was growing-up and needed you then or even now? It seems to me Karma that I need to find a way to release your energy of turmoil and place myself within your energy of happiness. I try to learn at least peace within, for some rest. What do I have to do to at least reap wherever I am going with consistency Karma? How do you listen to me? How do I let go of the harshness of my relations with these people? I am afraid when I voice my opinions, the brawls will be brutal and then we fall deeper into an abyss. I do not want the return of harshness and I need guidance from you. I am so often left with feelings of despair and I do not want these to be communicated to you and returned by you once again. Well again Karma, we as family do have many good times, good conversations, and great gatherings too. So….Karma, will my good, nice, and kind family interaction delete my cruel interaction? Are you transmitting a No back to me? Are you whispering to simply forgive myself, to move on through my intensity of this forgiveness and To Grow with the learns?
Again Karma, what if my family is Tame and Mellow, simple folks, working daily simple work, one step at a time in order to live. How can I now live these advanced times when all I have been taught is to be simple and now must live in a world that is no longer simplified? I think my karmic returns should be good ones, since I stayed within your laws of simplicity? I did not want more than my share, only my share! Since you cannot forget about me, how am I to live in this world as it has now become and not give out all my vibrations of despair, stress, and hopelessness for the rest of my long life? This is all my family taught me! I went on to work the best I could in the ways I could. I, as a laborer, was able to make money and bring home food for me, my partner, and my family. In now-time, this is not sufficient. Where are my sufficient returns or what do I need to do to cash in my good deeds from my old simplicity life style? I know you must have a plan for me, a simple folk, to help me out with this. Could it be that I just die off? Sometimes that just seems easier. Could it be that I am not understanding my Karma? Are those that I have helped along the way now there to help me out and give me the answers? Could it be Karma that those I did not help will not help me, thus another way of demonstration of your reaping? But Karma, what if I did the best I could along the way? I do not know exactly what you are now placing before me, is it the demonstration of my actions, words, and deeds? Is this also a mixture? Karma are you revealing to me the way I have helped myself thus far, and placing upon my shoulders the burden of revelation? Are you saying to me that your help to me is the realization that the love within help comes thru many resources? And throughout my looking I will find it, even through the simple way I grew. Are you assuring me it will come my way in a simple way of being but maybe even a different kind of demonstration from your returns from my choices? Are you telling me to just look differently? Hope I have enough time left on this earth to get my life good again and hope my time will be happier for me Karma.
Again Karma, what if my family is rich with wealth, taught and enabled me to conquer my world one step at a time in order to live the life I am now accustomed to? Why would I need to learn anything else if I have everything I need? I don’t need anything from anyone since I can pay and ask for anything I need in this world and it will be given to me, right Karma? Just like the Bible says, ask and you shall receive, I got that! So Karma, am I done with you? Is it just my say-so all the way? I think I have been shown all I need to know in this life, I am doing just fine? Is there something else I need to do besides be rich? Are you happy? What more can I ask for Karma? Are you saying to me that even this takes awareness?
Again Karma, what if I am born with any form of disability which has made me work really hard in order to simply live in my world? I am trying my best to move or communicate or learn or work or play; the things I see others taking for granted as normal. Of course I am building up bad thoughts, is that worse reaping’s for me Karma? I am just different than those around me. I may move differently or think differently which is making it difficult for me to understand that which “they” call the norm. I am not asking for much; just for you to be easy on me. Maybe I have parents full or grace, Maybe I have parents full of anger, Maybe I have none that I know of. Maybe I have parents and relatives and friends and acquaintances that move up and down this vibrational scale, both with me and within their lives. So Karma, did I reap this need of being taken care of much differently than normal? Will this become a blessing or a curse for me? And how can I receive this as Good when it feels harder? Am I still required to be the person with the happy thoughts and words and actions for my next reap? Will you still bring me a dream? Can I just get my good deeds now? How can I possibly earn good deeds from you when I have only enough energy to live day through day and frustration comes in and out of me? Are you whispering that those around me have the opportunity of learning kindness, helpfulness, gratitude? Are you breathing to me that everything around me has a Karmic experience? Mine is just one different experience, it’s all experience? Are you breathing to me that everyone around me is having a Karmic experience? Are you breathing to me that this is my experience of being and seeing and feeling and expressing out onto this world for now? Are you breathing to me that as I live this experience one way, this way will lead to another and one thing will lead to another and since I know enough to ask, it will start an evolvement? … Are you breathing to me to do the best I can and it’ll be over in a heartbeat since I am the energy?
Now Karma, what if I am born with an illness, right from the get go? How did I come in with that? I do not see this in my family?Why would you cast that upon me? How can my suffering ever be for the betterment of me since there seems to be more hurt going on than happiness? Some family members help me, some look at me with pity, some ignore me. I must say, I give back all different attitudes back, and I cannot say I feel bad about it Karma! Where is this taking my soul, I feel it hurting with me? How do I get to the place where I can earn your good deed in order to end my suffering here and now? Surely I didn’t do anything worse than them, and they are loving and healthy and brimming with happiness? Are you and I experiencing living as an illness together? Are you using my manifestation as the solid vehicle for my living illness? Karma, could this be about the living organism we call Illness that is growing into clarity? An organism, an ordinary fascinating organisms that is here learning, yet needs a body to live with for its own learning experience. Oh, maybe my organism is also here for the advancement of mankind’s doctors?! Really Karma?! Just a strange though of possibilities that was from a world of unlimitedness clearness. Why do some say “do not fight the dis-ease, love with it” and some say “fight it with all your might”? Am I supposed to fight or love your returns Karma? Or, maybe your silence is revealing to me the miracle of facing my so-called-being-of-illness and allowing me an endless possibility of filling my illness with the calmness, peace, and love that is within you, bringing illness toward health? Is this a way of dispersing more health into a living illness Karma? Is this my lesson and/or my opportunity as well as the family lesson and/or opportunity? Does this have to do with my ability of being friends with family and others with my same illness and help each other thus easing up my external frequencies? Is this a way of clearing energies Karma?Help begets help? I must inform you Karma that I know I have a strong soul in order to hold this body together! Karma, do you realize my body is in pain in order to live? Anyway Karma, how do I elevate my thoughts in order to live my life in peace and vitality, as I see it all around me? How do I live as illness and progress with love? Could it be the opportunity in “time” to dig deep inside, be at one with my intuition and reach for the understanding of my cause? Looking at myself this way is a tough one Karma. Since you are energy Karma, a force, as I understand you at this moment, I am thinking I will be in greater peace through you if I stay in touch with my thoughts of calmness and loveness. Correct? The thought of allowing the good to come through my bad? This will create a new understanding for my energy of dis-ease and its’ clearing. This is one Interesting concept of unlimited possibilities brought back to me because right now Karma, it is hard for me to think of these possibilities. I can say, a day at a time can get me through a thought of faith for a miracle. Will my thoughts bring unto me a Karma miracle? Are you vibrating to me to think very careful thoughts, time after time? That my soul is available for thought vibration? That one-thing-will-lead to another from you, thus all others will follow? Are you calling my body and its workings ‘others’ Karma? You brought me into a tuff one! I can say again, I spend most of my time thinking about me and not about my family. I can say, I think they should all be thinking about me, but most don’t. Do you think I need to take the love from those that love me and dwell on that? I am getting fear about my future. Will I reap a future from you Karma? Did you place around me a family that will always take are of me Karma? Fear is truly an overpowering emotion, how do I release that? Are you saying the strength is in the positive?
Again Karma, what if my family is filled with intelligence and teaches me the learning’s of ways some can only dream of? Now comes to me the presence of creating whichever talent I can for inner satisfaction, thus bringing upon me your reaping’s of mental satisfaction. This seems such an easy way for me because intelligence begets any form of intelligence I want, thus I am fulfilled with my choices. How did I earn this choosing of family Karma? Maybe some others would like to know? But then again, this may bring along with it many choices of attitudes if I am not mistaken. I may choose to bring attitudes to the forefront with my family dealings and my family may choose to do the same. We may agree or disagree. We may be allowing ourselves to bring karmic outcomes with every intellectual thought process brought to mind. And here we are, just the same as everyone else within family, showing proof of every family members Karmic decisions! This demonstration happens to be though all our intellect, but it will still be available for me and all the world to decipher when studied. Hope we as family create good spaces in each other lives. Likely we will because we can realize we need each other; learned it.
One more time Karma, but I’m sure it’s not the last. What if I am growing up in a family that is really just enough. What if I can’t really see or am even understanding how we all grow? What if we are not perfect at all, as a matter of fact, nether me nor they know what that is! It’s like we , including me, just roll with the punches and without the punches. I can’t really say what we do to deserve this or deserve that, we just get it; some bad and some good comes. I live through the giving and taking, heartbreak and happiness, and they live right along with me and each other. I mean Karma, sometimes its tuff, sometimes you bring it on easy, but you do bring it on. What is it Karma that makes me seem like normal? Is it because through this all, I can talk it out and there will be someone in family to listen? Is it because they can talk it out and they will have someone to listen? Is it simply because we have allowed some kind of closeness, thus you have brought the energy back to us of more closeness? Could it be that we somehow have looked for the love in each other so you have brought that love vibe back to us; something me and them can step into? Could it be that once we get into that caring space of yours and receive it back and forth, it is hard to forget so we keep looking for it? Could it be that the good time are like the miracles you bring back to us because we are looking for the good time within each other? Could it be that the bad times I bring on to myself are only what I can know, and yet I still am instilled with the confidence of knowing the good vibes I had learned, thus, making it easier to remember the feel of that frequency? Could it be that the whole family works that way with you? Could the Miracle be that maybe I am learning to look for the positive in my family, and they are learning to look for the positive too, and even when I skip a step, they hold the me up and vice-a-versa. Could it be Karma, that you are there to hold us up or down, whichever way we want to go?
Well Karma as I focus, we are so involved into family that there is more intermingling than meets the eye. It is all the universal concept. But, for me, the smaller mind of learning, this requires more of being thankful for my Life through family. It may take much mind work to evolve, but I can see that I am given the freedom to do so or not, through out all circumstances.
So Karma are you the extreme Guidance once again? Might it mean that we may have to live into many possibilities for the experience of it all??!
Forever Cheryl
“Minds will Matter”